Aside from being a reliably clean de-stresser, Studio C is human. See here. I sent them a message recently:
I had a funny dream the other night. Well, it was sort of a nightmare as I was afraid for my continued existence (you’ll see), but now it’s just funny. Here it is:
Mallory had become a terrifying creature that would absorb other people into her own mass. She looked just like she does now, but she was obsessed with absorbing as many poor souls who happened across her path. I didn’t see any of the other Studio C people, so I can only assume she had already absorbed you all. Alas. Anyway, when I first saw her, she was luring people in to get close to her by flirting with guys or being extra nice to girls, and then she would reach out and touch them! As it dawned upon them what was happening, fear suddenly spread across their features, but it was too late. Mallory would absorb them within ten seconds, and they were no more.
I somehow managed to avoid her, but she went around absorbing as many people as she could as she stalked me deep into an abandoned underground parking lot. The deeper I fled, the darker and danker and more crumbly the parking lot became, and the more dead, rotting hobos were lying around, sometimes in piles. There were also live hobos wandering around, of course, but not for long if Mallory had anything to do with it. And she did.
Somehow I escaped the dungeonous parking lot and was back out in the open, but even that was no safe place. Mallory absorbed everyone– man, woman, and child. Nobody was exempt.
I think Mallory and I made an unwary pact that she would not absorb me as long as I let her absorb everyone else. It was terrifying as she was being so sly about it that I never knew if she was going to break the pact. What did she have to lose?
What puzzles me is how she stayed the same size throughout the entire dream. I mean, if you absorbed hundreds of people, you’d get bigger, too, right?
Well, after this point, I woke up, and I resolved to let you know about this. It could mean something. Maybe Mallory has an agenda…
After a couple of days, Studio C responded:
Unfortunately Jordan, that wasn’t a dream. Fortunately, Matt figured out a way to recover all of the people Mallory absorbed and put an end to her reign of terror. It made for an interesting few days at the BYU Broadcasting building.
The only thing that’s terrorizing me now is not knowing if one of the cast actually responded to me or if they pay someone to manage their social media. Will we ever know?
I responded, of course, shamelessly trying to get my blog readership up another 100% from one to two:
I’m a person who blogs about these kinds of things, so I thought you might appreciate this:
You already know what it says (mostly) as most of the post is simply quoting our conversation. The biggest difference is my pondering whether or not this was actually one of the Studio C cast or just a social media minion. Mm… “just” sounds rather demeaning. I don’t exactly mean it that way, though you probably can’t blame me; people are rarely enthused about social media people responding to them. I mean, if Abraham Lincoln’s secretary said “Thank you for your input, good joe. Abe really loves it when people actually compliment him when he shaves, but he still feels that a beard is where it’s at. You might want to write congress to pass a bill if you really wish to see him cleanshaven always,” would you be as excited as if Honest Abe himself sent you a telegram?
Just think about it.
Studio C again responded, this time within a couple of hours:
Here’s a picture of the individual running this page.
Hopefully I didn’t offend him… or her?